BrauchTalk

We’ve all heard the saying before: “Men fall in love with their eyes, and women with their ears.” I know this was definitely true in our relationship. When M and I were dating, he was the sweet-talking king, but I knew he meant every word he said. And it worked! I fell totally in love with him, and now we’ve been married over a year. But now that we’re married, it doesn’t mean the nice words should come to an end. If all you guys out there are trying to make your woman fall head-over-heels for you again, read on!

The five phrases a woman needs to hear often:

I think you’re beautiful. It doesn’t matter how high a woman’s self-esteem is, these words are needed and desired by every woman in a committed relationship. Just because you said it when you were first dating, or on your wedding day, doesn’t give you a free pass to never say it again. I find that the longer I am married to M, the more I want to hear him tell me I’m beautiful. It builds confidence and lets me know that he still finds me to be attractive. A sure sign that you are not saying this phrase enough is if your girlfriend or wife continually asks, “Do you think I look fat?” or something to that effect. In many cases, I believe that women who ask the question are really asking, “Do you think I’m beautiful?” Our culture teaches us that looks mean a lot, and reassurance from our man that he likes the way we look means volumes to us. So trust me guys, this one will never get old to us. So say it!

I’m listening. It seems like guys have a hard time with this one. Blame it on the wiring of their brains, or whatever, but it is hard to grab a guys full attention in a lot of cases. If men really want to knock a woman’s socks off, just listen! Turn off the radio or the TV when we start talking to you. Look us in the eyes. And most of all, don’t jump in with your advice one minute into the conversation. I know that my husband seems to have a solution for everything, whether I am looking for a solution or not. A lot of the time, women just want to vent a little bit. We want to know that our feelings are being heard. So don’t jump in with your advice right away, but instead listen to us.

It’s going to be alright. A reassuring word means a lot, and even more so when accompanied with a little cuddling. On days that I wish God would take me to my eternal home, M usually has a way of calming me down again. We women can get really emotional at times. I know there are times that I can start crying for basically no reason. And there are times that there is good reason. Those feminists out there would probably hate to hear me say this, but women want to know they’ll be taken care of. It has nothing to do with being a so-called weaker sex. It is simply a basic need, shared by all people, men and women alike. So if your spouse is going through a tough time, give them a big hug and tell them everything will be alright. And believe it or not, we’ll believe you.

What can I do to help? Such a statement says a lot about your relationship with your partner. If a man is asking you about what he can help you with, you can rest assured he sees you as an equal partner and knows you shouldn’t be the one doing everything on your own. It means a lot to me when M is willing to ask if he can help me with anything. He realizes we are both equally busy with life, and I can’t keep up with the housework as easily on my own versus tackling the chore together. This statement doesn’t only apply to housework either. If you are going through a tough time, a good man will not only notice, but will care enough to ask what he can do about it. That’s when the tendency of men to be problem-solvers comes in handy. Men that are willing to put themselves at our disposal will find a fond place in our hearts.

I love you. Okay guys, if you haven’t gotten this one down already, good luck! Don’t just assume that we know that you love us. Sure, it is important to show love through your actions, but hearing it from your lips makes it complete. If these words are said sincerely, they will never get old to us.

I hope this advice, coming from a wife myself, will help all you men out there know what you should be saying often to remind the women in your lives of your love and commitment. If you want more ideas on how to keep your ladies happy, I suggest you read M’s post on How to Keep Your Relationship Healthy With Your Wife.