Our American culture likes to poke fun of the fact that some women let their emotions carry them away, some more often than others. It seems like men are always making jokes to each other about how moody women can get and how they will never be able to fully understand the mind of a woman. I am certain that after this last weekend, M can join the crowd. So all those guys trying to understand their special lady’s emotional state and what makes it tick, keep reading. Being a woman myself, I would like to write from my perspective on this issue of the labeled uncontrollable emotional state of my gender.
Let’s face it, women are wired completely different than men! Our brains work differently. We think and do things differently. Our physical make up is different. But these are all good things! We were made to be compliments to one another. Generally speaking, women tend to be more emotional than men. This is nothing new to us. However, when a woman starts getting “moody,” they easily get labeled a five-letter word and men give it no further thought.
This is not a men-bashing article. If anything, I want to help men and women better understand their wife’s (or own) emotions. I want to use some personal experience from M and I’s relationship. First of all, M and I rarely fight. But when we do, it seems that I am almost always the cause of it. M would never accuse me of this, but I know it’s true. How? Because every time we fight, its because I am an emotional wreck.
For example, this weekend I got home from school, M got home from work, and we were fixing supper together. Sounds fun, right? It was, until we started sarcastically teasing each other, which we do often and usually it doesn’t bother me. It was all out of fun. But for some reason, words that were exchanged suddenly struck a nerve with me, and I instantly started boiling inside. It only progressed from there. M thought we were still joking around, and each thing he did hurt me even more. The ultimate offense was when he gave our dog something to play with that I had thrown away. When I found it on the floor, I picked it up, apparently yelled “you stupid idiot” (we don’t swear) while throwing the object at him and ran out into the garage, crying.
So what was I feeling at this point? First of all, I was cold. Our garage isn’t heated. Second, I couldn’t understand why on earth I went from having fun to instantly freaking out. I sat in the garage a long time, not to punish M and wonder when he’d come get me, but to punish myself. I felt so stupid. I had never gotten that crazy on M before. And what was even more bothersome was that there was no reason for it. To this day, I still can’t understand what happened to make me so upset. So finally after “calming” down, I swallowed my pride and went back into the house.
M was probably feeling pretty lost at this point. But to be honest, so was I. Was it a combination of stress, hormones, and built up emotion that caused the explosion? I really don’t know. And the sad thing was, my emotional state lasted all weekend. Friday was the explosion, Saturday I was weepy and doubting M wanting to be with me, and Sunday I was down and slept nearly half the day. There was no reason for me to doubt M’s love for me, or to be depressed. But I was.
I definitely don’t mean this to be depressing. I just want to tell men that it really is true; understanding a woman’s emotions is nearly impossible, even for women! I can’t even understand it myself. When M asked me what was wrong, I seriously couldn’t give him a reason. But as with everything else, it will pass. So just stick it out and remember that the woman you married is still under those death-stare or tear-filled eyes. And lots of hugs and reassurance that you still love us helps too.